KuAi lUi uNlEaShEd

For the first time since i’ve been here, i finally miss home.

- The cozy and warm (mind u, very warm indeed in the afternoon) bed i laze around since i was a kid.

- The kitchen where i sit and talk to mum while she’s cooking.

- My ’study’ table which manages to look like a typhoon just went pass it all the time.

- My tiny room where i share with my sisters and mess up most the time i’m around.

- My pc which is the main cause i stay up late at night and do all the nonsense i do.

I can’t believe the next time i’m going back i won’t be sleeping in the same house i’ve been since i was born.

I wanna cry…… In fact i am fighting back my tears which are trying to force themselves out.

I’m not as tough as i thought i was. I wanna cry everytime i feel alone here but i always manage not to.

A friend once told me i’m escaping from the world when i came here.

I prefer to think that i’m getting adapted to a new world.

Is it crazy if i secretly loathe the happy look on ppl’s face? A ‘Latoo McBunny’ friend of mine told me i’m getting very paranoid.

I can relate anything to everything and make it seemed like some mafia conspiracy or at least my imaginary conspiracy.

I need to get a life soon….

ps: I’ll be home for Christmas! I’m celebrating Christmas with Justin and how pathetic is that?

…but but i’ll be home that weekend ‘cept for the eve which i will be in KL with Justin. erhem…

pps: in case u r wondering, Justin is the HK singer u slimy wart.

ppps: the above post has been written in a very emotional mode. as many entries before has been.

i think i’m going through some sort of mid-life crisis ‘cept mebbe mine should be called adult-hood crisis. =p

How weird and what a coincidence it is when i try to post a photo and it keeps getting rejected even after i changed the file extension. The weirdness in it is that of the person in the photo i seriously am beginning to despise. Funny how most the pictures i like usually comes with the same person.
I should get a life. => seriously….
Btw, pls tell me boots aren’t the hottest fashion item now. I’m dying to get myself a pair or 2.

p/s: forgive me bcose i find myself sounding very bitchy. i am usually like that.

What happens when all hell breaks lose?
Presumably Lucifer will send all his devoted underworld followers and wreck the
hell out of earth. What if one day Lucifer decides to turn against himself and
be good for once?
It
will never happen. So, it’s the same for me. When I find out about something I know
will happen but dread about it – ALL HELL BREAKS LOSE.

Don’t
expect me to pretend to be nice and fake like the devil when he’s trying to con
someone into worshipping him and following his every antics. I dun understand
how some people can be so tremendously pretentious when it comes to the simple
truth. Why can’t people just be more straight-forward? Things could be much less
complicated this way. Wouldn’t earth be more peaceful if Lucifer just wasn’t so
evasive? No offense to Lucifer of course, I particularly find him an
interesting character much to the stories or shall I say the tales that made him
so infamous today.

Now,
the fixation about people is that they obsess too much about things that are so
totally irrelevant that it probably wouldn’t even harm a fly or may be a scrap
of algae by the drain. When it comes to obsession, I believe I’m an obsessive
person. I believe that I am totally OCD. What makes a person obsessed? It’s
because that person is too fixated on a matter that doesn’t matter at all and
it makes that person possessed in something he/ she believes in.

A friend®
was defending another friend £ today saying that whatever £ does is to protect
our friendship. If lying is a way of protecting a so-called friendship then I don’t
think this so-called friendship exists. It’s a fictional thing where £ is in
her own world of belief and pretense. I do not belong in the world. Therefore,
stop saying things that make yourself sound extremely and ridiculously silly. I
do not tolerate absurdity and I cannot endure people who look upon me as if I’m
a fool. Stop telling me that everything £ does is only out of careful consideration
and therefore are sensible actions. I’m fed up with all the lies and ridiculous cover ups. Thanks but no thanks so beat it. Just chill, let it go and be yourself. Ok?

Lucifer
doesn’t have a true friend and neither does he need one. Did you know Lucifer was
once an archangel in heaven? He is known as the fallen angel who rebelled against
God and was sent to earth thus causing him who he is today.

I
think it is enough of squabble for the day, coming from me.
Haven’t
had such a long entry for ages, I guess most of you would find it dreadfully
confusing and boring. I’m sorry for the endless rambling, just can’t help
myself. Maybe it’s the weather up there freezing up my brain cells and it melts
too soon when I’m back here.
Kidding! Well, that’s all for the night.

Good night & sweet dreams!

Glossary:

OCD – Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

OCD is a type of anxiety
that happens when there is a problem with the way the brain deals with normal
worrying and doubts.

p/s: pls leave your name the next time u send an sms to me. i lost my hp so i might not know who you are. thank you!

p/p/s: congrats, so i heard. simply can’t find any 2 more deserving person. so, my heartiest congratulations to you-know-who-you-2-are. no sarcasm intended.